Day Forty Two

SO Lenna needs some money.

After paying Mom for my amazing new phone and after I pay off my credit card later this month, I will have $200 to my name.

Now, I am not worried about my current situation, but the one I will be in when I go to school. I lost my Work-Study, so I have no idea if I can keep my job in the Sci/Math lab. I would LOVE to still work there, but if not...o___o;

So as you know, I set up a Zazzle Store and I hope to make something off that. Even if I don't, I'll eventually pony up cash to buy my own products. Bahaha.

Second, I was looking at donating Plasma. There is a place in St Joseph where I can do that- I've been there before to drive certain dumb bitches there. It claims I can make up to $260 per month. So I've been looking at this site, which isn't affiliated with the place itself, but answers questions and stuff. If I get desperate enough, I suppose that I could do that. I qualify so far (I weigh wayyy more than 110lbs...) and when I'd get there, I would be tested immediately. Its possible that I might not qualify due to not eating enough protein, or having some weird disease I don't know about. o_o

It would be scary as hell, so I figure I would either a.) take a stuffed thing with me to comfort me or b.) grow up. X3 Hopefully both.

I was also looking at part time jobs on campus. There are tutor jobs for ENG 100 and Math (ugh, no way...) and Administrative Assistants for Security or for the University Advancement Office.

Of course, I could always work off campus and in town, however this would be a horrible thing because my grades would suffer. My grades suffered Senior Year of High School because I was working 30-something hours a week plus going to school. I do NOT want to sacrifice my school work for money because then I will lose money because getting bad grades means no more scholarships. So if I were to work off campus, I would have to work 15 hours a week, max. There is no way I will work more than that.

But I figure, I could apply at Hyvee, Target, Hobby Lobby, and any of the other little places up on the Belt.

The more I think about it, the plasma donating thing sounds like a good idea...even if I have another job too. But needles are fucking scary....*A*. But being poor is fucking scary too. Gyah.

I dyed my hair yesterday~! It looks nice. I did not want to change the color drastically, so it kind of looks the same, but more reddish-magentaish. Mom says it looks more magenta now, but its not that drastic. Baah. I really like it, so I might dye my hair again in a few weeks when this color fades. Next time, I'll do it all by myself instead of with Mommy's help. That will work out okay, right?

Today, I plan on making some more goodies for my zazzle shop and then uploading some stuff to Deviant and posting links and blah blah blah, hopeing some of my fans on Deviant will want to buy some cute goodies. Ha ha ha.

My left eye has been bothering me again. It gets red and watery and my left nostril runs with boogers and grossness. The left side of my head is trying to kill me! At first, we though it was my contacts, but I haven't worn them for most of the last 3-4 days, only for 6 hours yesterday while dying my hair, and I took them out right when my eye started to hurt. I think its allergies, and so I want/need some eyedrops or allergy medicine or something. Everyone tells me to change my contacts. How useless is that?

I'm just really worried about everything right now. Grrr.

Maybe later I'll sew some. I started making a Yuna-style skirt. I don't know if its for Halloween or what, but its some awesome silky fabric I got from Walmart's scrap fabric brin before they stopped carrying fabrics (bastards >_>). It's fabulous.

Day Thirty- uhhh...Forty?!

I can't count.

So I woke up today with the allergies from hell. The problems with my left eye being red, itchy, watery and feeling awful is NOT the fault of my contacts (thank you Jesusman!) but is the fault of my allergies. My allergies are un-traditional- they only appear when they feel like it. Like right now. So all day, I've been sitting around bitching and asking for the Benadryl-Fairy to come and save me. Heh.

While bitching, I FINALLY set up a shop on Zazzle.com. Go buy shiny crap from Lenna from here! SO far, I've created 3 mugs and 5 pins using these two characters I've been dreaming up for awhile. Elle and Lacie are the names I gave to the duo of gothic and sweet lolita characters that have been floating about in my head for X months.



Aren't they cute? You ought to go buy a button with them on it. XD Actually, this specific picture isn't on anything in my store because its too small and I'd have to up size it and then pixellation and blah blah blah. I might have to re-do this picture because I really like it. But yeah, all the pics are these kiddy-styled drawing instead of the usual anime style I draw in. *w*

I think that perhaps that even if no one else buys this swag, I might buy the mugs I made. I love tea cups and mugs and things to drink tea out of. Xp

In other news, I am going to dye my hair tomorrow. Oh boy oh boy. I bought some yesterday (along with baking supplies and lots of stuff I should not have bought but needed anyway, like fake nails and pads and face scrub and conditioner. >_> Don't question my questionable motives...) and I'm excited. <3 And then I want to make cookies, damnit. I was going to make cookies today but alas, I felt/still feel like shit. T_T

BAH.

OH. I looked up the costs of textbooks and stuff for next semester. T_T It would be all fine except for the goddamn book for GBA211...I don't even know what class that is, but that I need it regardless. GYAH. And I don't know what kind of Micro book I need...the 10th edition is out but the 9th edition is what's listed. T_T Goddamnit.

I want cookies, damnit. But I already had dessert- Edy's Summer Peach Pie Ice Cream. OH EM GEE! It is SO good. Reminds me of Haagan Dazs Peach Ice Cream...which those bastards discontinued.

Oh em gee, I love Peach ice cream. u_u

Day Thirty Eight

I am going to wear my new pink dress in public today. It is really so cute...except next time, I'll make it longer. It looks weird around my butt sort of. T_T Its probably because I have a huge ass. I wish I had no ass like Katie claims. She is so cute and thin and I wish she was my little doll so I could dress her up in all sorts of cute frilly things. Oh well.~

I did get all dolled up though. Wearing some pink knee socks and some of my nicer shoes and I curled my hair. <3 I really wish I could go buy more knee socks and shoes. I really love knee socks, especially the ones from Target that they carry in the winter time. Hell, I love cute socks from Target regardless of the season! And shoes- I love all the cute flats that Xhiliration makes, but they are more decora than lolita really. But I suppose that's alright- my homemade style of lolita can get kind of decora-ish sometimes. *w* I like decora fashion- its so wild and plastic-y and reminds me of modern childhood while lolita reminds me of victorian/roccoco childhood. *w*

Damnit, now I have to look at shoes. Bahaha~

I would really like to get a nice pair of heels or two- plain heels or something. And sandals- cute ones. I used to have a pair that were hand-me-downs from someone, and they were strappy and stuff and I loved them. Alas, the straps broke.

Aw, my Mommy says I'm beautiful. Of course she would say that. ^o^

Anyway, these are really cute, but I think the heel might be too small, but I could deal with that. I LOVE these, but they're almost like the other flats I have...but man do I love ballet flats! These are cheap anyway...<3.

WAHH I want to buy shoes. T_T

Update- My skirt and dress

Here are the pictures I promised!~ This is the dress I made. The pictures aren't really all that great, but I think I look cute in the second one. *w*



Here is my skirt. The second one is of a closer look at the hem and the little bows I put on it. Can't see it all that well in the first pic. I think I did this skirt really well.



In the second one, you can kind of see the pattern some too. Its so adorable, I would go and buy up even more of this fabric if I could freaking find it. *x*

I'm quite proud of myself. <3

Day Thirty Seven

It always begins with a random inking or though in my head.

"I wonder when the next Gothic & Lolita Bible will be out...?"

I got vol 5 last month, so its probably too early for it to be out soon, but I though that it was supposed to be 4 issues per year, one per season. I have winter08/09 and spring 09, so where is summer 09? Or will it come out later? BAH.

Anyway, now I feel the need to make LOTS AND LOTS OF CUTE LOLITASTIC STUFF.

I ought to finish my skirt. Its made of the awesome fabric from Brother and Sister Design Studio (who annoyingly enough, don't have a website, or I can't find it. T___T) that is creme colored with pink fairytales on it. X3 Its so amazing and cute. I made a Burda dress from it and its not really all that lolita, but its very cute. And I'm half done with a frilly tiered lolita skirt. Just have to attach two pieces together and then maybe add some ribbon.

I'll post pics later- of the skirt and the dress.


AND then I want to make some more cuteness...however as I told you a few months ago, most of the patterns I got are (gasp) too small. T___T I might be able to fit into a size 14 dress, but...but it may be a tight fit and...and...u___u;;;;;

I don't nearly have enought zippers anyway. BLEH. I'll finish my skirt and then maybe make another one, or try to make one of the super crazy cute little handbags from vol. 5.

ALSO. I will MARRY anyone who buys me this:


Is that not gorgeous or what??? There is a Madam Pompador and Princess Adelaide dress as well. (This one is Marie Antoinette...<3 What can I say, I'm obsessed?) But its $300...U__U;;; SO expensive.

The milisecond that we win the lottery (ha ha ha!) I am going to order SO MANY dresses and cute things from Candy Violet. Damnit, I MUST support a domestic lolita company! There is no way around it! I would probably end up buying up their entire inventory....;__; I wish I was rich or so talented that I could sew like that.

THAT SETTLES IT. I'm going to clear off the table and get cracking. I will make lots of pretty things until I run out of fabric and then I will...I will buy more fabric! XD Haha~

Day Thirty Six

I played DDR today after not being able to for a few weeks due to having to drive Dad around town and then some. It was kinda fun. I ought to get back in the habit of that.

MAN I am so annoyed for no reason. I really want to go shopping. I could use some more panties, and cute clothes, and some of that face mask stuff that feels weird but makes my face feel soft when its washed off. But then I went to the bank and deposited $25 and realized just how POOR I am. >_> Need more gas to put in the car too. Bah.

John said that there was some Mt Dew throwback left at a nearby gas station. So tomorrow I'll go buy some of that and some gas too. If they have it anyway. If not, I'll be so SAD. T_T I'll buy up 3 or 4 cases of it. I'm so weird. Bleeech.

Today is Mom and Dad's 20th wedding anniversary. Crazy, right?

I was wandering the internets tonight and ended up looking at some random wiccan/tarot/metaphysics forum. On one hand, if I were ever to get into religion and the like, I would totally get into witchcraft. It seems pretty cool. However, on the other hand, I remember that I am a science person and any involvement in such is simply me lying to myself about what I believe.

It's like this. One thing I read on the site was about how if you do 'x' at a certain time of the month when the moon is all blah blah and stuff, then supposedly one will be more fertile or more successful or whatever. However on the otherhand, the moon has not a damn thing to do with anything in your personal life. So I suppose that its all up to what you believe.

I wanna play with my tarot cards, but honestly, I cannot think of anything to ask them, and more so, I don't know how to read 'em. They're really pretty though- some manga art styled one. Hehe. Lenna is a dork like that. That's why she got them in the first place- they're pretty.

Did you know that Mary Queen of Scots had a personal Fool? Like a jester, or whatever? Yeah, I'm reading a novel about it. The novel is mostly fictional, but its based on real people and events and such and its really interesting. I would have finished it today but I got a wicked annoying headache.

Whelp, I have nothing else of importance to write about. I've been having some weird dreams. Not last night but the night before, I had a dream where I was in a pseudo-zelda-modern world and I was in some abandoned office building full of people squatting because everyone was poor as fuck, and in the window sills of closed windows, I saw HEADS. Like they had turned the windows into pseudo-guillotines. Then at one point of the dream, 'me' (who was not really me, but some uketastic kid) decided that would be a good way to off myself, but Mr Hero rescued me by sticking his arm over my head, and the window fucking broke his arm and everyone was pissed off and crying and shit, except him. It was pretty awkward. I want to write a story about it. So far, my story gives the 'me' character a backstory of that he (lately, the 'me' in my dreams have been young men. Ehh.) was made to marry some abusive bastard duke in place of my/his twin sister who went poof, but the way I met up with Mr Hero was because I somehow escaped, all the while the me/him is psychotic and suicidal. I think that part was also from a dream, but I don't remember the dream itself.

I might have issues. Too bad no one really gives a fuck around here.

HAha, I typed duck instead of fuck at first. Bahaha.

Day Thirty Four

Happy 4th of July, bitches. :)

My gut/uterus/stomach/mid section HURTS. Somehow, I am going to write to the Mt Dew people and ask them to bring back Mt Dew Throwback because it is DELICIOUS.

Well, I posted some shit on Mt Dew's facebook. Bah, everyone has facebook now.

So I'm just in a generally shitty mood. Its temperate and muggy in here and its pissing me off. Tomorrow is when my period is supposed to start, so that would explain the epic pains and bitchiness. BAAAH. >__> Dad goes back to work tomorrow. 'Bout damn time, I'm sick of him being around so much. I love 'em but he pisses me off SO BAD. GRAAAGHHH!

>___> Urgh.

I had a nice dream last night. I was wearing an emerald green sun dress and was going somewhere and had my hair down. I remember that I was wearing some awesomey cute felt-like slippers that matched my dress. Then I got to this castle-y garden-y place that was some kind of yoga-spa-martial arts thing and this other really gorgeous girl met me there and she started to teach me some kind of martial art. She looked indian and was wearing a cute sundress like mine. We had these long broomstick handles and were doing stuff with those, like swinging them around. Then her sensei or some guy came over and told me that if I was to do lessons, I'd have to tell them my monthly salary. I told them I was jobless, and so then he said I'd have to rent these two books while taking lessons- which I though was a shitty idea, so I got the author names and titles so I could go home and buy the books off Amazon, but this guy pisses me off. Kekeke. But then I woke up. Urgh.

The dream makes me want to make a long flowy sundress or something. Something really cute. *w* That would be pretty awesome. Maybe I'll do that tomorrow cause hopefully there won't be many people around to be in my way and piss me off. GRR.

Monday is Mom and Dad's 20th Wedding Anniversary.